cute underwear and crying..a lot (love exposure review)

10/10 – love exposure – sion sono

     A lot can be said about this 4 hour long, sacrilegious, tearjerking Japanese movie from the director of “Suicide Club”. First, I have to say that when I had originally heard of this movie, I thought it was your average romance movie which led to my disinterest. Although romance movies that aren’t made in Hollywood are a little better due to the lack of the same old potato-looking white actors and Nicholas Sparks stories, romance movies still hardly peaked my interest. The 3 hours and 57 minutes of runtime also likely made me turn my head. To say my impression filled with ignorance was incorrect would be an understatement.

     Just thinking about the movie makes me want to cry into a jar and send it to the director. The movie has everything from gore to humor to lesbian schoolgirls. It’s long without ever having a dull moment. It’s funny without being cheesy. It’s sad without bumming me out so much that I feel like I need to watch an 80s comedy to bring me back to life. It’s religious without being pushy. It’s romantic without making me nauseous. It’s violent without, again, making me nauseous.

     I went into this movie not knowing what to expect. I came out of this movie with tears streaming down my face, a feeling of accomplishment, a new crush, and a smile on my face, much like the ending of Cry-Baby. After seeing this movie, I feel like nothing else could compare. I’m filled with passion for nearly all of the characters, even ones in the background with no lines. The two real-life musician main actors bring their characters to life in a way I’ve never seen.

     Hikari Mitsushima, a former member of Folder 5 and Folder, plays a man-hating grunge fan with daddy issues and a love for Jesus. Takahiro Nishijima, a member of AAA in his first movie role, plays a religious young boy also with daddy issues, wreaking havoc in the name of his father’s love, much like Shinji Ikari. Anything else I mention would ruin the magic a little bit. And it is just that; magical. This movie is an experience I recommend for everyone, and that includes your child, your future child, and your pet.

tennis skirts and tsunderes (imopara/imouto paradise review)

5.5/10 – imouto paradise – moonstone cherryAlone in your house for the summer with your five little sisters while your parents are on vacation in who knows where? That’s the dream! While it’s arguable that incest is morally wrong, and wrong on many other levels, it’s also arguable that these girls are cute as hell. No matter how morally correct you feel you are at heart… I mean, look at them. Plus, you’re basically the only guy they know! The bond between a big brother and his imoutos can be so strong.

The game is a little long. According to its page on VNDB, it’s 10-30 hours. Since the game has no real plot and relies on weirdly initiated hentai scenes to get you through the end, it’s a little slow. However, you’re sure to expect that from just the cover alone, it’s no Kana Imouto.. or any other visual novel that has a seemingly enveloping plot. I wasn’t just referencing to the imoutos. Once you’re a few hours in, it’s kind of like, “When will it end?”

Of course, that’s coming from someone who probably doesn’t enjoy erotic visual novels the way one should. If you enjoy hours upon hours of sexual situations with your somewhat unstable little sisters initiated by peeing or reading or playing tennis, this is your game. If you have five little sisters and parents who like to travel, don’t get any ideas. The game doesn’t have much that other hentai games don’t, except for the twins. After playing the (whatever her name is) longer hair twin route, I’m honestly disappointed that there was no (SPOILER) threesome with them.

Again, though, that’s coming from someone who probably doesn’t enjoy erotic visual novels the way one should. If you have some free time or just need something cute/hot to fill your day, go get Imouto Paradise now! The sex scenes were very nicely animated. Also, Michika is any sane person’s dream girl.